Shove your “ism” where the sun don’t shine.

Recently I was called out,  it vexed me because to me they were saying this guy is an example of why we are pushing our agenda. I hate all “isms” whether it is Feminism, or Elitism. They all have the fundamental same crap going on. They think the world owes them something, when really it doesn’t. The world isn’t fair, I faced my challenges, you have yours. Does it make it right that people are looked down upon, or treated poorly because of race, gender, sexual orientation, etc, etc… No it doesn’t make it right.

This is the main reason I hate “ism’s” they are quick to point out the wrong or ills of society, but when you come to them with positive stuff, and solutions they try to excuse you summarily, or try to say your derailing the conversation. Society has many ill’s most based out of Fear, Fear of Change, Fear of the Unknown, Fear of being that which you hate.  I read a quote, I don’t know the author but it said, “We hate that which we see a little part of ourselves”  Like the Homophobe who hates homosexuals because they fear, and hide the fact that they indeed might be a homosexual.

“Isms” don’t belong in games,  I think some people need to pick their forums better, most game players usually don’t give a rats ass whether how they treat the opposite sex, heck go to the Barren’s Chat, and you will really know.  It’s like every time you go past GO in monopoly you get to hear the vagina monologues. How fun is that? Not very unless you do have a vagina.

I just want to touch on privilege, I would be naive if I said it doesn’t exist at all, but I think there is two sides to every coin. For example, it says in 38, about women doing the most repetitive, unrewarding  jobs of the house…Oh really cutting the grass, is fun…really? I love lifting heavy shit because the couch doesn’t look right there….and really do you need to scream bloody murder for me across the house when you see a spider, and have me kill it.  Personally as for privilege, I’m just another ugly fat white guy, and I never got things my way…ever. I’m sure if I was Brad Pitt the story might be different, but it’s not. 

I’m not saying your problems or arguments are moot, they are quite valid. The problem is it’s a society issues, and the only way to change that is the majority of the society has to change their way of thinking. This doesn’t happen overnight, many things are getting better for those who are not White Anglo Saxon Male, and the media confirms this.

The only person I can control is me. So I live by a couple of rules when dealing with people, I don’t care if your male, female, transgender, homosexual, bisexual, white, black, yellow, red, or purple.

1. Civility – If I come up to a stranger, I will say please and thank you. Treat them with a cordial attitude. If they are rude, and mean to me. I will cut them down to size with every weapon at my disposal, if that just so happens that you’re a woman, yea I might say something mean in that regard.

2. Respect is earned, not given – I don’t bow to anyone, and it’s usually my way or the highway, but if you earned my respect through your actions, then I will stand up with you at the Gates of Hell themselves. I don’t even have to like you to respect you, it helps though.

3. We are all different – Celebrate that fact, because it adds to the fun of it all. If I played with 20 River’s I’d be bored to tears.

4. Do the right thing, simply because it is the right thing to do – Unless you’re a sociopath, you know the difference between right and wrong.

5. Words have consequences A fellow blogger, and friend said this to me, she is right. I may say something like, “bitch” doesn’t mean I hate women, and want to oppress them. I should remember though, that words to carry their own weight, and people judge me on what I say, as well as what I do.

5. Don’t be a sheep – even I am caught up sometimes when in a group of people, sometimes I let things go too far. One must have the strength to stand by their convictions.

A final word to all those “Ism’s” out there pointing out how bad I am, you just make me get defensive, and close my eyes, and ears to what you are saying.  I don’t think your agenda has a place in video games, but because we our a society albeit a virtual one it mirrors our real society to some extent. Bottomline to be a better society, we need to start being better people.

As for me, I hate everyone equally.

53 Responses to “Shove your “ism” where the sun don’t shine.”

  1. Legolas4Life Says:

    Ism’s in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an -ism, he should believe in himself. I quote John Lennon, “I don’t believe in Beatles, I just believe in me.” Good point there. After all, he was the walrus. I could be the walrus. I’d still have to bum rides off people.

    Ferris to the Bueller

    • Metaneira Says:

      Actually, the Walrus was Paul. (cf “Glass Onion)

      Thanks for the hits to our blog, though! You’re entitled to your opinion, but since you started using gendered language to insult me, I thought it best not to let you express that on my site, which supports inclusive, constructive commentary and discussion.

      Pointing out privilege and getting people to recognize that their actions are hurtful to others is doing something. I’m sorry you don’t think we’re doing enough, but I assure you I’ll work harder to call people out on the things they do that are offensive, demeaning, and demoralizing to others.

      • theerivs Says:

        First your welcome.

        Welcome to High Latency Life, No punch will be pulled, no flaming comment deleted. I do not hide. I stand out here on the internet for all to come face me. I even put my real name on the banner, cause I stand behind my actions, and words…as crass as they may be.

        Well your audience, or mine wouldn’t know I insulted you because you deleted the comment, yea I called her a Whiny bitch, well if the shoe fits. I admit I use fiery language, but to me it doesn’t matter if you have a penis or not, and frankly I don’t care. You chose to use me as your example. I think your rhetoric doesn’t belong in video games, I think it’s fear-mongering, and hate peddling at it’s very best. It’s on the same level as those kids that yell “Your mom is a slut” on Barrens chat. You use big words, and try to sound intelligent. You sit on your pedestal and condemn judgement on us. You never used your tits to get out of a ticket, or bat your eyes at some guy to open a jar of pickles. If you say you never used your gender to get what you want out of life, I call you a fricking liar.

        You speak of privilege, really seriously…I’ve seen pretty girls get away with things resembling murder. Oh wait that’s the problem maybe your one of those bitter women, perhaps your not text book pretty, but hey maybe you got a nice personality…well if you weren’t a whiny bitch. I apologize to you on behalf of the man who hurt you, but were all not bad guys.

        Feel free to comment more if you wish, but I don’t think you will. Cowardice is usually a trait of your kind. Those that hide behind “ism’s” like…Facisim, Racism, Sexism. Yeah and Feminism.

      • Metaneira Says:

        I do not use my real name on my site because I have been the subject of stalking and harassment. It has nothing to do with fearing what I say.

        You and I disagree. It doesn’t matter if you call me hateful names; it doesn’t change how I feel or what I believe. I will continue to view your attitude as part of the problem, not the solution.

        I didn’t approve your comment because it used words that are not inclusive: I said as much within the post. My site is designed to help people feel safe, and someone using gendered language is decidedly against my site’s aims. You’re entitled to your opinion, and you’re free to continue ad hominem attacks on me instead of actually examining the issues. You, of course, only benefit from the status quo; why would you bother to examine your behavior to see how you might treat others with the respect they deserve?

        I am not a feminist because a man hurt me, and you cannot apologize for anyone else’s behavior. I am a feminist because I believe that men and women should be free to choose their own paths in life without the strictures of their gender identity influencing them or limiting them. I want to live in a world where men and women make the same money for the same work. I want to live in a world where men aren’t told to bottle up their emotions and “stop crying like a girl”. I want to be free to go to a party and have a drink without worrying if someone’s going to take advantage of me. If you don’t care about these things; if you don’t think men and women inherently deserve equality and respect, well, this conversation is most certainly over.

        But thanks for hitting just about every square on my bingo card! I’m surprised you didn’t call me fat or a dyke. 😛

      • theerivs Says:

        You speak of some magical priviledge, or status quo….In my life I witnessed none.

        I’m going to tell you a story. I worked for FTD, the flower company, my boss was a open lesbian. There was a co worker, who I trained and she didn’t even know the problem with the users computer was the NUM LOCK wasn’t on, when it should be. She was a manager within a year. Where was my male priviledge? Do you think I was pissed, and thought the world owed me something. No. I actually worked there until the lesbian boss yelled at me for an event I wasn’t even present for. It was like high school all over again.

        I want men to live as long as women. I want to get off parking tickets by just flashing my tits. I want to be able to take a day off because I have female problems. I want to be able to do the dishes instead of mowing the god damn lawn, I am sick of being the one changing a flat tire. I hate spiders just as much as you do, I don’t want to kill the little bastard. I want to be able to act like a jerk, and blame it on hormones. I can go on all day like this.

        The point is in life, we don’t always get what we want. The major difference between me and you is you feel you are entitled to things. Respect is earned not given, and Life is not fair. There will always be the have’s and have nots, and no one is truly free, we all have to answer to someone or something no matter what gender you are. Are things getting better, I think so, and you can thank the women who worked for change, and not sat on a pulpit demanding it.

      • While I think Rivs is way out of line with a lot of this, ultimately (I think) what he’s getting at is that by calling yourself a feminist (the “ism” you can shove where the sun don’t shine), you are perpetrating the very division you seek to destroy.

        If I’m wrong, that’s at least what I think of the whole thing. /shrug

        Referring to yourself as a “feminist” immediately puts people (read: men) on the defensive. Terminology is what terminology is, but why don’t people just call themselves “equalatists”? That’s really what the aim is, I get that – but “feminism” implies trying to advance only women’s cause.

      • theerivs Says:

        Me out of line??? Really. LOL. Nevah 🙂 But you are on point with one of my arguements.

      • Drew, I’m replying to you as Rivs has completely careened off the deep end, I think. Adding homophobia to his other lists of issues.

        I call myself a feminist because women are the marginalized party. It doesn’t mean that I care only about women’s rights, but rather that women need more attention than men do. I use the language of centuries of women who wrote and thought and fought for these issues before I existed, even as I recognize the problems of their own views. (For instance, most of feminist history has been focused on white, educated women, and you’ll find that a lot of women of color do not choose to call themselves feminist since the movement has largely ignored them.) Language is tricky, and I realize that as soon as I drop the f-word people are going to assume I’m a hairy-legged lesbian who hates men and thinks we should round them up into camps. The word is not without its problems, which is why I took the time to explain what it is I’m espousing on my own site. I care very much about how men are treated in this society. The system hurts everyone: it hurts the boy who gets made fun of for playing with dolls and it hurts the young woman who gets called a slut because she had consensual sex with someone. Thinking about it, writing about it, talking to people and changing minds is what I can do right now. I can challenge laws that discriminate against genders (for instance, in my home state, men cannot be the victims of rape, which is absolutely absurd), I can call attention to issues, and I can engage in discussion with others. I do pick my battles, though: as you can see, Rivs is going to throw “benevolent sexism” in my face. (Yes, women don’t get drafted. That is ALSO part of the problem.) But open minded people like you are good to engage in discussion with, even if we do not agree, and even if we cannot come to a resolution. Getting people to engage these ideas can only help make the situation better.

      • theerivs Says:

        How do you get homophobia out of what I said? /facepalm

      • Because you found it necessary to point out she was a lesbian, as if that was even remotely relevant. It’s not.

      • theerivs Says:

        No I hated the person herself. Actually I’m quite active in the gay community. My brother is on a float at gay pride every year. This is first year I missed.

        The only reason I mention it is because I think she was sweet on this girl that’s why she got the promotion, cause I know it wasn’t this girls skills. I was trying to say women do the same thing men do sometimes, even the bad things. Not because I am homophobic.

      • theerivs Says:

        Let me put it another way…I don’t hate one sect or group. I hate everyone equally. LOL!

  2. Legolas4Life Says:

    And I’m not going to stand for this Paul being the Walrus crap! If Ferris Bueller was wrong, that is like saying my entire childhood was a lie. So screw that!

    • theerivs Says:

      She’s referring to John Lennon’s song Glass Onion in 1968, he did say Paul was the walrus, but on severel occasion earlier and later John refers to himself as the Walrus. Such as his solo song God.

      We all can agree though that Ferris is correct…always

    • Actually, I just watched this today and it cracked my shit up

      • theerivs Says:

        ” I just watched this today and it cracked my shit up ”

        Your starting to sound like me, better not float around this place to long, you’ll be tainted. 🙂

  3. Hi. This is off topic, but I don’t care.

    I rolled a warlock just so I could name it Rivs and neglect it.

  4. Scarybooster Says:

    Ism= hate. The only way to be equal is stop blaming others for what they can’t change. My dad always told me, “Stop making excuses, it is your fault except it and change it”

  5. Blue Collar Bitch Says:

    There’s so much wrong with this post but I think I’ll focus on the thing that really pissed me off the most, because it’s two in the morning and I’m tired from work.

    The blatant, slobbering, moronic sexism (WHOOPS an ‘ism! Heaven forfend! I’ll wait here while you go change your underoos.) in this comment made me laugh out loud:

    “Oh really cutting the grass, is fun…really? I love lifting heavy shit because the couch doesn’t look right there….and really do you need to scream bloody murder for me across the house when you see a spider, and have me kill it.”

    What the fuck? Do you live with Beaver Cleaver’s mom?

    I’m female and I’d like to say that I, for one, mow my own lawn every week. I even whack weeds and tend the tomato plants and other shit like that. I know that turns your world upside down, I’m sorry.

    Not to mention I do contract custodial work, which often involves pulling the furniture out of several rooms every night so I can extract the carpet or refinish the tile. I lift things with my patheeeeeeeetic little feminine arms that would make your asshole weep.

    I *do* hate spiders, but I also know and work with grown ass men that run screaming at the sight of a mouse. So don’t even start that shit.

    Protip: You’ll get laid more often if you stop acting like a whiny, insecure shitsplat.

  6. Simple Man Says:

    @crushed balls – I hardly doubt you even like cock, well at least one that isn’t a strap on from your bull dyke girlfriend.

    @ Blue Collar Bitch – What point is that, your bitter at men for treating you poorly cause your probably more masculine then most dudes?

    When was the last time you even wore a dress? I bet the thing lifted by your pathetic feminine arms most is your vibrator. Yeah you work 2nd or 3rd shift, and do custodial work, isn’t there a bridge you should be hiding under, waiting for 3 goats to cross.

    If your too obtuse to understand this I’m calling you a bitter, ugly troll of a woman that probably needs a good dicking.

    • theerivs Says:

      Angry guy is angry lol

    • Crushed Balls Says:

      Wait, I’m supposed to be offended by being called a Dyke?

      *Snorts* Try harder, clearly you’re a very angry little man who has no idea what to do with a woman. Seeing as you asked, I’m married and trust me sweetie, he’s got more than enough in all the right places, and I’m not just talking about the size of his penis.

      ‘Simple Man’ How deliciously apt…

      • devilandme Says:

        I’m not sure why touching these douchebags with a ten foot barge pole is preferable to being a lesbian.

    • Blue Collar Bitch Says:

      But if I’m a bitter, ugly troll, how would I go about procuring a good dicking? Also, lol sexism AND classism. You’re cute. I’ll remember that the day all sanitation workers go on strike and everyone’s up to their eyeballs in shit and disease.

      Actually, I wore a dress this Sunday for the Fourth. I looked pretty bangin’, too. Too bad you missed out on that, I’m sure you were inside gently cradling your balls all day, lest those scary phantom bull dyke demons come and cut them off while you’re sleeping.

      I do love my vibrator, don’t get me wrong. But I love men more. Men that understand a woman is not an object created to serve his personal interests, but a human being. Men that treat me with the respect I afford them in return. An equal partnership? It’s pretty sexy, let me tell ya.

      I’m sorry girls were mean to you in gym class. But it’s time to move on. You can get out of that fetal position now, there’s a beautiful world out there.

  7. Simple Man Says:

    @Crushed Balls – I don’t remember asking, but thanks for volunteering the info, I was stating the fact that you may be lesbian, by your hateful demeanor towards men. Whether your offended or not that’s up to you, I think you were…obviously you have issues if you need to defend you sexuality. Me thinks the lady doth protests too much. It is obvious you have issues with men, your name bespeaks volumes. I bet your husband is a hen pecked, dead inside sort of man, who can’t even go outside with your permission, damn pussy whipped diluted fool. No worries I’m not pussy whippoed, I whip that pussy.

    @devil and me – you want to touch my 10 foot pole, your more than welcome.

  8. devilandme Says:

    That’s what they all say.

  9. Crushed Balls Says:

    Oh dear, you really do have issues don’t you. I don’t hate men, I love them, I adore girls too, but that’s besides the point.

    Clearly sweet thing, you are the one who felt the need to defend your genitals, tiny and insignificant though they may be, despite the fact the comment wasn’t directed at you. Are you in need of counselling perhaps? Or better yet, a decent surgeon? I hear medical science can do wonders with a Micro penis these days. Pity it’s not capable of helping your over inflated Ego, though.

    And if you want to discuss pussy whipping, lover, that’s an entirely different conversation.

    • Simple Man Says:

      I love how women zone in on the one thing they can attack. The penis. Oh my gosh they want to hurt a guy make fun of his penis.

      How cliche…River why do you let these girls continure with such lame material.

      Well I’m done with you women, when you have something worth saying I may respond.

      • devilandme Says:

        Yes because “lesbian” and “pussy whipped” is incredibly original.

      • Crushed Balls Says:

        I love how jumped up Mummy’s boys with the apron strings so tight round their necks their choking , zone in on

        1) You’re a Dyke and you HATE ALL MEN

        2) You’re husband/boyfriend is obviously a pussy

        3) You’re all Whores/ugly/fat/stupid and all it takes is good deep dicking to make you realise your place.

        4) Make me sandwich, get back in the kitchen, get me a beer, suck/touch/fondle my cock or the classic Show us your tits.

        It all boils down to the same thing, You’re not getting any, you’re repugnant on all level to women and you’re pissed women are capable of seeing that just by looking at you and the second you open your mouth and let your flacid jowls wobble.

        You lack intelligence and you mock that perfectly well on your own without our help. Mocking your Penis is tit for tat. Childish perhaps, but your ilk have been doing it for years.

        It’s about time the ladies started brining the chopping knives to the table, even if it is to watch you bleat ineffectually over how butthurt you are that the mean ‘whores’ wont play niiiice.

  10. Simple Man Says:

    @devil and me – Well all women are whores in some way or another. Whats the difference if you blow a guy cause he just bought you dinner, or left 50 bucks on your night stand.

    In fact I have more respect for prostitutes cause you know your going to get services rendered for your money.

    • devilandme Says:

      Are you still here? I thought you were “done with us women.”

      Typical. You can’t leave without having the last word lest someone have to call the Waaaahmbulance for you.

      Poor bugger.

      • Simple Man Says:

        Well if you douched your shit once in awhile you could get off the internet, and get laid, and dislodge that pole from your ass.

  11. devilandme Says:

    LOL you’re so easy to piss off.

    Nothing like having a beer and provoking idiots on the net after a hard day.

  12. theerivs Says:

    @Simple Man, Devil, and Crushed – At first it was funny, now it’s sad on all 3 of your parts.

    All of you get a life.

    I pride myself on not censoring anything that goes on in my blog, but sometimes, and it’s days like this I tend to want to rethink that policy.

    • theerivs Says:

      I apologize to my readers, I let this get out of hand. I don’t hate women, any man who is born of a woman, and who has sisters, or female cousins, or daughters should strive to make a better world for them to live in.

      I don’t hate women, I love them. Though I am a man, an I celebrate being a man. I am rough around the edges, I drink whiskey, I fight, I do stupid shit, I do love bewbs.

      But not once in my entire life would I disrespect a women in public unless she disrespected me first, or let her come to harm on my watch. Thats the problem the other blog put me up as an example, and that hurt. I let my hurt guide my actions. I said some stuff to play devils advocate.

      Do I think women deserve their lot in life, no. Things are rough all over though, and there are alot of ills in society we need to correct, and as long as we keep intelligent dialogue open, then things will get better.

      Are we so different, no we aren’t. We want the same thing in life, to pursue happiness, who am I to say which route is better.

      Enough is enough.

  13. […] opinion on the feminist movement in gaming is best explained here in my comment on Riv’s blog. Basically, it should come as no surprise that men get defensive […]

  14. […] was reading over my thoughts  (sadly empowered fire is gone, another arch enemy gone  ) over this subject from a […]

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