Reasons Mages are better than Warlocks

Everytime I see a Warlock it reminds me of that old Parkay commercial. Where the tub goes butter, until the person takes a taste and finally admits he’s Parkay. Like the Fake Butter, Warlocks are just fake Mages, wanted the same respect as we do…Well I never played a Warlock, for sociopath demon worshippers they are ok, but lately they been getting uppity. So it’s time to smack them in their place again.

Reasons why Mages are better then dirty…dirty…Warlocks.

10. Don’t have to listen to that horrible EMO music.

9. Don’t have to listen to demons saying stupid shit all the time. Cute when Blueberry says something, not cute by 1000th time.

8. Portals look cooler, their summoning cabinet looks something that should be half priced from IKEA.

7. Stupid Demon names, I saw a Fapwyp the other day. You know what Fapping means?

6. Didn’t we fight wars to get rid of the Demons?  It’s like hanging out with Hitler after World War II.

5. Cleaner….. Water Elemental means all we need to do is bring some soap, and we got showertime.

4. Slow Fall – One of thee coolest spells…evah! Back in the day POM>AP>TRINKET> PYRO while flying was the coolest thing ever. then slow fall to safety. Then they changed it…bastards, it’s still a cool spell.

3. Polymorph though it fell out of favor in recent days, I still love sheeping an enemy player. Pisses them off to no end.

2. Teleports – I don’t need anyone to get where I’m going. Hell with my Hearthstone in the right place it would be days until I see a wind rider….DAYS!. As far as I know, to summon someone…someone’s got to be there for you.

Number 1 Reason that a Mage is better than a Warlock……PEW PEW PEW…we got fricking Lazers….. They don’t.

There’s a reason your Warlock trainers are under Inns, or hidden in the basement…you all stink.

5 Responses to “Reasons Mages are better than Warlocks”

  1. I have to disagree with you. I enjoyed playing my Warlock one hundred times more than my Mage. The mage was my least favorite character I played out of a Priest,Druid,Pally,Warlock, and Mage.

    Oh did I tell you I hated my f’ing mage!!!!!

  2. Damned right.

    My hearthstone has been set to the Crossroads since I rolled my mage at the start of TBC and it’s not going to change now. I suppose I could put it in Kargath or somewhere useful, but I have portals for a reason.

    You forgot:
    11: Whatcha gonna do with all that junk, all that junk inside your biscuits. My biscuits, you love my baby biscuits. =)

    • But getting harassed for biscuits is enough to make you want to delete your mage. I hated it.

      • Kellendon Says:

        Pshhh. Being harassed for biscuits aside, there’s nothing better than infinite free mana/health refills. Main thing i hate about playin other classes is lack of biscuits. Hell, on mah mage, I can eat after every single thing i slay.

  3. i profer warlocks becuse if your a mage your probly a dick like this person saying me class better than yours

    have a demond is like have a mage with you nag nag nag i better than you

    yer warlocks use evil magic and demonds but for good /nutral or evil uses

    the only thing the humans seem to cear about is killing of all that opose there ideas the one that is targated the most is the undead not the still mindless ones the free one the forsacon and magic being the ones usaly going in tring kill the inisant forsacon when all thay whont is a city of there own it was obandond when thay got it but no the humans manly the human mages go in trie kill as meany as posabal tring steel the city

    also mages thing there the big dps house ronge the warlock is much better for dps lower hits but rapid in big groups of hostals the mage only good one on one there multi shot is the weeker than warlock and the warlock one one the demond hits just as much dps as the mage and it helps you as a personal tank helper if using speshalist demonds

    being abal to take a hit of to is inportant E.G in dungon the tank lost the agro of a small gruop hostals if your a mage in 3-10 seconds geting no help your dead warlock with the demond shearing the damage on you and also could hold the agro off you without help or help for demond the warlock would die in 30-50 seconds how a class using cloth thay can last just as good as a hunter some time

    mages players are usaly just snobs thinking there unbeatabal but there dam rubbish
    magical classing system fearly baced on usfalness & abilitys

    [1] druid- padlin
    [2] shaman
    [3] warlock
    [4] prest
    [5] mage

    forget puting warlocks in there place the mage need to be pushed off there highy pedistal thinking there the best when there probly bad class to be it probly becuse mage was to populer when the game started and no matter what smart peaple say there out tring say there better but they seem to hate warlocks more than over classes brobly becuse there galess of them

    ps show the way make that mages see how bad there class is and stop bothing over classes about it

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