Mages: True Masters of the Arcane

Ok the Whorelocks decided to up the war of words with this post.

Now I am going to straighten a few things out for you.

* Mages are not carebears, nor does our magic come from carebear land. We tap right into the magic of the world, and make things go BOOM!

* The Water Elemental is not a thing that gets stuff marginally wet, it’s not cute, or fluffy…It’s an element bound together by magic to help slay our foes.

* Ice Block, and Invisibility are neither sneaky or wimpy. They are tools in our toolset. Pretty awesome ones at that. invisibility probably saved me more gold on repair bills then anything I’ve known.

*I never heard anyone complain about my strudel before. If you don’t like it…then quit hitting my mage table like it was last call at the buffet.

*Warlocks are just jealous we throw real fire, that our frost looks damn cool, and that mages got lazers, and can go “pew..pew..pew”

Ok Let’s clear some things up about Warlocks, or Whorelocks as I call them.

*  They Need big burly pets to help them cause they don’t last long by themselves.

*  Blizzard felt sorry for them and gave them that stupid teleport thing. Cause their little feet can’t runaway fast enough.

*  DOT and running away is not a tactic, it’s an organized retreat.

* Are the EMO kids of WoW, go back to your closet and jam out to Cradle of Filth, and leave the killing to the real masters.

* Your power comes from someone else. It’s like your a stay at home mom, yes I agree you work hard, but you know what someone else is bringing home the bacon.

* Think they are cool and bad ass….your wearing a dress.

* No one really likes you, their just lazy and don’t want to run all the way back to the meeting stone.

Listen Warlocks are ok, some of my best friends are warlocks. I don’t mind they want to play WoW on easy mode. When their ready to set the level to difficult and roll a mage, I’d be happy to show them how to really play a caster.

Bottomline as cool as Whorelocks think they are, we got teleports.  The boat, and zeppelin are over there I suggest you start walking.

16 Responses to “Mages: True Masters of the Arcane”

  1. krizzlybear Says:


  2. “I never heard anyone complain about my strudel before. If you don’t like it…then quit hitting my mage table like it was last call at the buffet.”

    I love this!

    /added you to my Blog list – welcome!

  3. morkuma Says:

    1. I don’t need your food. I heal myself. I just take it because I feel sorry for you trying to make friends with food.
    2. Sorry for us? You have blink, ice block and invis, seems like you got the sympathy there.
    3. In fact, blizzard felt so sorry for you that they allowed you to steal others spells, guess they figured you might want a good one every once in a while
    4. Dresses? Look at what you are wearing…..

  4. So, mages and warlocks are the only “real” casters? Hrm…

    • theerivs Says:

      Yes the only two I recognize. The others just posers and wannabes. LOL!

      Here’s the progression.

      Boomkin wanna be Shadow Priests, Shadow Priests wanna be Warlock, Warlocks wanna be Mages.

      • And he deliberately passes over elemental shaman.

        Is it because we’re mythical creatures like unicorns? Or because we only get raid slots because of Totem of ZOMGSpellpower for all? Or because we end up being panic healers way too often when the real healers go SPLAT?

        The world may never know…

      • theerivs Says:

        Whats this elemental shaman you speak of? Seriously though if you wear anything then cloth your not a real spellcaster in my book, your just a toon with spell like abilities.

  5. Teleports: Making Mages Better Than Everyone Else Since 2004.

  6. Summoning portals. Enough said.

  7. […] do not Equal Mages by Saresa prompted outrage from theerivs.  Doesn’t matter.  Can’t tell those sissies in their dresses […]

  8. Nope shaman don’t cast spells. They command nature itself to attack their enemies. Warlocks rely on pets, and mages got portals so they know things. Don’t get me wrong I like you.

    But elemental shaman command nature. Druids kinda ask it for stuff from time to time. Shaman don’t ask, they just take.

  9. […] do not Equal Mages by Saresa prompted outrage from theerivs.  Doesn’t matter.  Can’t tell those sissies in their dresses […]

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